Yesterday's Sins

Have you ever felt that you are somehow paying for some sin you’ve committed in the past? That is how I feel sometime more over today. It’s like all the wrong I've done is coming back to torment me. Not that I done anything more than anyone else. Matters of the heart where this depression is coming from. It’s like now my soul is matured enough to deal with matters of love, that my past transgressions seem to block all hopes of real love. That is how I feel today. I ask myself what the hell is wrong with me. I am very handsome, I smell good, I am smart, I am witty and most of all a good heart but why am I am not seeing love. Waking up each morning with a sense of something is missing somewhere in my life. Seeing my friends all in love I admit I am jealous sometimes feeling hatred that they are so happy; but that soon pass and I comfort myself in knowing that my day is soon about to come.Now it feels like I am going through life with my eyes shut so afraid to open them because I see happiness but happiness does not seem to find me. I am not sad or depressed by any mains but just a little discourage. I am not the only one who feels this way. So I take the time to apologize for all my sins and beg love to come knocking at my door. Will love find me? Did I change the address of my heart and didn't not Notify justice? So today I make amends with my pass. I take of the bondage of sadness and regret and I open my eyes and I let love know where I am. I am sure love will find me when he finds me there will be no letting go.