Act like you paying for it

When you pay for it you to appreciate it more; okay I went down into Manhattan to help a girlfriend out with training at the gym. She was behind me to show her some stuff at the gym, well I went to do just that. Everything I suggested she didn’t want to do that really pissed me off. All that came to mind was if she was paying for a trainer she would do just what she/he said. This is a phenomenon with most things you do not have to pay for you just do not appreciate it. Another example; a friend asked me to help out with a project. I go out of my way to do it to make sure it’s a success for him but the fucker is late and I mean late. Anyone who knows me knows I go crazy when it comes to being on time. Some people go crazy over wire hangers I go crazy over punctuality. I cuss dude out and storm off and it came to mind if he was paying for it he would act differently. Do not get me wrong I am not saying I want payment but I want you to act like you are paying for it. I want you to give me your best and I want you to show up on time damn it! I try to treat my friendship as a job that I am working for a promotion. I give it my best. I try to return calls in a speedy manner and I let them know I love them and I appreciate them. We all take someone for granted if you know who that person is call them and tell how much you love and appreciate them. I know I will be making a call today.

BY THE WAY THIS IS MY 100^TH Entry!!!! AYE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love me.

If no one else loves you love yourself. I love me.

Well I am on new diet. It’s a low sugar diet it’s driving me a little crazy but I like the results. So here are new photos I just took.

Banging on Doors

The Hunt is on. For the past few days I’ve been out looking for part-time work something to hold me over until I start my real job in a few short months. Man it’s been hard but I am out there handing out resumes like Michael Jackson hands out candies at his sleepovers. I’ve been uptown, downtown and around town. The hunt is on and I do not feel discourage I know what is out there for me and I will get it, that is for sure. I’ve been meeting some interesting people who like myself are on that quest for work. I am knocking on so many doors someone will open up soon until then I knock and I smile. I’ve been meeting some funny people out there too and some cuties have mercy!! I just got into the house was gone since 2pm now its after 12am. This job hunting is giving me a reason to be out the house I tell you that much and I like dressing up looking all cute and shit and smell real good. Well yall pray for me that find something so I do not have sell my goodies. LOL Well its off for a late night snack then hitting the bed until I start the grind all over again tomorrow.

Eyes on Prize

So its morning went to bed somewhat early last night. I got a lot of writing done. I am working on my first big project which is a Fantasy novel. I’ve been writing it now for like two years but anything good takes time. I love poetry but I really love story telling. It’s something new fresh full of magic, love, adventure and a little funny too. I’ve been really working hard on it. I had to bring myself to the point where distraction was not an option anymore. It seems the more you try to do good the more calls you get the more emails have to be answered. It’s like there is a well organized plot to take your eyes off the prize. This is what happens when you try to move up in life; so many things of unimportance try to pull you right back if not under but to a state of distraction. I know I am not the only one that sees this pattern in their lives. So I am making it a point to be more focus on what needs to be done. Work then fun I will do more typing than talking. I have to maintain the path and do what I have to do to survive.

Powerful Quote

This Quote took me there today had to share it. READ IT, DIGEST IT, LIVE IT PEOPLE. THIS IS Just Powerful.

"I expect to pass through this world but once. Any good, therefore, that I can do or any kindness I can show to any human being, let me do it now. Let me not defer or neglect it for I shall not pass this way again." -Etienne de Grellet

Killing me Salting

While riding the train home tonight I noticed a rather nicely dressed black woman. She was in her mid-fifties from the looks of her. Girlfriend was dressed to kill. I watched her for awhile something I do a lot to strangers but she didn’t take notice of me. She was carrying a white supermarket plastic bag which she reached into and pulled out a box of Ramen Noodles. I was in a state of shock all that came to mine was she was “Killing herself Softly” or should I say “Killing herself Salty”. You know Romen Noodle is so ghetto. So do not front. Man color folks sure do love those Romen Noodles but do you know eating one of those quickie killer contain about 1600mg of Sodium and it is recommended that we only consume less than 2,400 mg per day of sodium. Now that is just one sitting. No wonder so many of us are walking around with hypertension. Then she took out a folk then I almost died I thought she was about to open it up and eat it right there and then but she didn’t. I think I would have passed out laughing if she did. I know it’s a cheap meal I use to eat them too but when I read what was in it I realize that we are killing ourselves by eating all that shit. I know all the colored folks have had them some Romen Noodles so do not front I bet half of you have some in your cupboards right now. So all I am saying is please, please, please people lets get away from that. Anyway gonna get me some noodles now damn I hungry. Joke!!

You're Not Alone

When you think you are alone in situation; you know what? You’re not. Too many times we take the position of feeling sorry for ourselves. We think that this is the worst thing that ever happened to anyone in the history of the world. But you know what? Its not. I went to dinner with a coworker from my part-time job tonight Julie. We went for Thai food which is one of my favorites. We sat and talked for 3 hours it was wonderful. I was reluctant a little bit of gong out with her because I sort of felt she had a crust on me but I was glad I did. We both opened up about what was going in each others lives. It’s so funny we were and are going through the same things. I think God sometimes allows people to come in your life to let you know, “hey you are not alone so stop bitching like you are”. When you think you have it bad someone else has it worse. But this is 2006 a year of bigger and better things. We talked about relationships or the lack there of and I found out too she was in place like me waiting for that special someone and feeling a little lonely while waiting. I totally related to her. At the end of the night worked to Washington Square it was nice stroll. She is a very beautiful girl chocolate skin and the brightest eyes I have ever seen that just lights up when she smiles. Fate is so funny in a different time or place maybe.

I sense a change for both of us soon good things on the way

Wet Underwear Contest

Here’s to a new year. I said I would do things differently this year, step out of that box and stop being so shy. Well I did it last night. I went to the movies with a friend saw “Munich”. It was aight too damn long but then again everyone know that Spielberg can not do a movie under 3 hours. Afterwards we went to Luke and Leroy’s were to my surprise they were having a wet underwear contest. Well I entered. LOL Yeah, me it was lots of fun and besides I worked really hard on my body why not have some fun. I came second it was good with me the guy who won I admit was damn sexy too and he had a fan basic of his friend there with him I was alone but I did well. I felt like college boys gone wild but I did not show any of my goodies. Just having a little fun last year was shy guy this year is fly guy.

The Longing

The Longing

Slowly I roll back the covers from my queen-size bed.

It's so cold and empty the place empty where you laid your head.

The pillows speak with my senses as I smell the remnants of your cologne.

Turning over I gaze at the phone. Ring Damn it! Ring!

Your tie hangs on the door knob my tie hangs over yours as if even the fabrics long to be entangled with you or anything that is yours.

Closing my eyes I channel you as if by some mystic magic I could summons you.

Damn this bed, it might as well be as enormous as sea that’s how it feels when you are not next me.

Touching the spot where you like to kiss I remember each indentation of your lips.

I remember your lightly haired chest your strong arms even your unique musk.

Oh that musk a mixture of work and sweetness many wear that scent but only you carry that essence. Ring Damn It Ring !

How I long to be spooned by you while we watch those silly movies.

To feel you kissing the back of my neck so softly and for no reason saying “I love you”.

Will you come back to me? My hearts races when you are gone.

I fall in love with you each time I see you for the first time. Will you be mine alone?

Right here lay a heart that is ready to commit to you like no other

To love you stronger than a mother

To protect you more than a big brother

To do it better than ten thousand lovers

I wait longing for you.

A GOOD DAY!!

Okay it’s a start to a whole new year. I think so far I am doing real good if I might say so myself. I made it a point to venture out a little more from the nest. I went out bar popping on Sunday it’s so funny since I do not drink. I had my special “Cranberry with a slice of Lemon”. So far everywhere I went I got a number or two. LOL My heart is not in it like that. I know people looking to get their fuck on but I am redirecting myself. I am in a position where I want companionship not just a quick nut. I’ve decided I am going to turn masturbation into an art until I meet someone who I would want to get it on with totally.

Today I woke up feeling a whole lot better emotionally than I’ve been feeling since Adam left. Sleep always does that to me heal all those wounds. I still miss him so much but I am feeling more aware of what is right here with me now. It’s amazing the effect that some people have on you. Do they even know how much they affect you? Love is a strange thing it hurts when it’s gone but feels so good when you got it. So this year I am gonna fall in love all over again I know it. I just got up a few minutes ago I am going to take my ass to the gym. May perhaps do some laundry too.

Today is a good day!!! That is my proclamation. A GOOD GOOD DAY!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL AND TO ALL A GOOD LIFE

It’s a New Year and I am a new person. Man 2005 was a year of so many surprises but that is in the pass now I can and will not look back at that. I have my eyes on the prize. I am focused on what I want, need and I’m ready to go out there and get it. I am that living rock in 2006. I am Stone with a heart of gold. So gonna start this year off right.

Happy New Year to all and to all a Good Life!